There is quite a bit I have discovered about myself this past year -- both good and bad. So, I figure, why not go ahead and spill it? Let's get it all out there -- the good, the bad, and the ugly. I mean, it IS a time for resolutions and all.
So, yeah, I don't really DO resolutions per se. I like to just make a list of things I am going to "do better" with. It's much more attainable. And when I fail (inevitably), it is much easier to just jump back on the bandwagon and "do better". It's not like I need to do something MAJOR like "stop smoking" or my whole "do better" approach would not really work out. But there is plenty for me TO improve on. Just ask my husband and kids...they will happily provide you with an endless list, I am most certain of it! Ha!
First, I will start by stating that 2011 was really a year that I opened my eyes and honestly and truly took stock. I fully recognize the many blessings in my life. I have 3 healthy children (well, they are healthy SOME of the time), a fantastic husband, a great family, and really the most unbelievable circle of friends a person could ever ask for. And no, I do not mean just FB friends (though many of you are great cheerleaders and/or make me laugh DAILY)...I am talking about my friends that acutally help my life RUN on a daily basis. 2011 was the year I recognized without a doubt that I CAN NOT DO IT ALL. And thank goodness, I have family and friends who are willing to help pick up my slack. I have accepted more offers for carpooling, babysitting, and playdates than EVER this year. When a friend calls b/c they know I am home because I am sick or am home with a child who is sick and offers to pick up a smoothie, a meal, or make a grocery run for me.....I have learned to ACCEPT it. I have friends that really ROCK.. Bar none...they are the best. That said, I hope that I am repaying them equally. I want my friends to know that I will do the EXACT same things for them. So, I know for sure that this year (and every year hereafter) I will "do better" at thinking of others first....seeing what I can do to make someone else's life easier on them. It's the small stuff -- the carpool, the playdate, the grocery run -- that can absolutely make someone's day.
I am also eternally grateful for the fact that I have friends who are willing to live with sleep deprivation in order to run with me at the crack of dawn...simply b/c once my day starts with children, I am DONE. There is no daytime exercise with a 3 year old still at home. It is a sacrafice for my friends to drag themselves outta bed at some point during the 5:00 a.m. hour just to run with me. I am forever in their debt. The same with training/running races.....it is so very lovely to have friends who are willing to torture themselves with training and running a half marathon just because I have a bee in my bonnet and want to FINALLY finish one in under 2 hours. (Now, when I finish in like 2 hours and 2 min....I will take a respite and "do better" on the next race b/c by golly I am going to DO THIS!)
I am also on a mission in 2012 to "do better" at parenting. I pretty much wake up every day with this mindset...but I am setting specific goals. I am going to try to yell less...it typically does no good anyway and just puts me in a bad mood. Plus, it is modelling really bad behavior that I do NOT want my kids repeating. I am going to try and say "yes" more often. Now...this does not mean I will be saying "yes" to all the impulse items my kids BEG for in EVERY SINGLE STORE we go to. I am going to try to say "yes" more often to the things that I just typically avoid b/c they are annoying: letting the kids "cook" something on their own (no heat involved), letting them do more crafts, make more fun messes. I think my kids deserve this. I am sure that I will fail along the way...but "do better" is the motto. From now on, I am actually going to THINK before the word "NO!" comes right out of my mouth.
2012 is going to be the year that I try to "do better" with spending $$. My husband is on cloud nine with this one. I just need to be a better shopper...more picky, less impulsive, look for sales. Clarification: I am STILL not an extreme couponer. I am just going to try to be more frugal in my every day endeavors.
UGH....I gotta get organized this year. I am beginning to fear that some of my cabinets (think tupperware cabinet) are spontaneously reproducing. I must do better that just TRY on this one.
Fact about me: I am a bad listener. I acknoledge it. And isn't that the first step, really? Acknowledging the problem. I am going to "do better" -- focus more on listening and less on talking. I think that is what others want -- what they desire and deserve. Just a really good listener. There will be plenty of time for me to talk about the inaneness of my day or life. Patience is a virtue that I was not really blessed with from birth...I am definitely working on it.
I think my final "do better" is a good one. I am going to really try to not talk about someone who is not in the same room as me....as in, if I would not be saying what I was saying TO them, then I should not be saying it at all. This town I live in is TOO SMALL. Everyone knows your business. But, I do not think that give free license to TALK about other people's business. I am guilty of it...but DID get better this year. There were so so so so many times that people asked me questions about other people's business and I could HONESTLY say "I don't have a clue". Part of this has to do with the fact that I have fantastic exercise buddies. We sort of live in a bubble. WHen we run together we literally only chat about OUR lives. I can tell you this -- we do NOT NOT NOT talk about other people. It is simply refreshing. And...it has helped me learn that this is a good thing to carry into all areas of my life. Am I perfect? Heck NO! Inappropriate things slip out of my mouth a lot...and I am GOING to "do better". I just am. I never ever again want to be the person who opens her mouth and hurts another human being. Ever.
OH! And wait one more: I am going to "do better" with this blog. I will try to write more often. Writing is cathartic and I really enjoying imparting the craziness that is my life. I am thankful that there are some people out there that relate and laugh along with me (at me?). :-)
So I write all this down for accountability. I figure if it is in writing, I can look back and remind myself what 2012 is going to really be all about. Here's to a great year...full of blessings, health, and happiness for you all!
xoxo! Jennifer
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