FAIL!

Failure xs 1000!  I feel like I am like a tremendous failure over and over again.  Ugh. 

 

Here is my life in a nutshell....my Tuesday:  Get girls to school.  Rush through the grocery store.  Call dr. office while we are there to try and get an appt for 3 yr. old to have his ears rechecked....suspect he is still infected which means 2nd set of tubes.  The dr. office hems and haws and finally says the ONLY timeslot they can give me is 3:30...I explain that is FINE, but we HAVE to be IN and OUT b/c 6 yr old, 3 year old, and I all have dentist appts to have our teeth cleaned (same building, different office) at 4:00.  No prob they say....will place a note of up front for us to be "sent back immediately".  My 8 year old has dance from 3:45-5:45 but I resign myself that she can just go early with a snack and homework and sit there for 25 min until her class starts. 

 

First failure, the bus is 20 min LATE.  Seriously?  20 min????  The bus driver "wanted to do a new seating chart"...how 'bout you do that at HOME beforehand....you DO have the list of potential riders.  There went ANY wiggle room b/c as a mom 20 min = a LIFETIME.  I am rushing children in the door...throwing 8 yr old into her dance stuff and getting her hair in a bun (required this dance year); brushing 6 yr old's teeth; waking 3 yr old from nap and brushing his teeth; etc....throwing people into the van. 

 

On the way to drop 8 yr old at dance, it is apparent that we are going to be late for everything EXCEPT her dance.  Drop her...race on to dr.  Run into massive traffic AND road work.  Failure.

 

Roll into the parking lot and it is ALREADY 3:40.  I call dentist and explain we are running behind and they huff at me.  I finally just say, we will get there ASAP...just clean whoever you can with time allotted and the rest we will reschedule.  Fine.

 

I walk into the ped office and it is f*ing WALL to WALL people.  Not. Even. Kidding.  FAILURE.  The chick at the front desk hands me a STACK of forms b/c "they switched to a NEW computer system and NOTHING transferred over".  No. Way.  I explain that I am not even sure that we have an appt. time slot...we are just ear check...they should have a note to send us straight back.  She doesn't bat an eye or check but sends me on the way to fill out my paperwork.  At 4:10 when I have asked her AGAIN to check with the nurse who ASSURED me that we would be in and out in time for our 4:00 dentist appt, I am STILL sitting in the waiting room.  6 year old finally just asks if she can walk down stairs and get her teeth cleaned....I figure it is more sanitary so we rush out and down the stairs.  I literally throw her into the dentist office at a NEW set of hygienists and say something like, "We are still waiting upstairs...start with her...we'll be back in a few minutes." and then run out the door.  Failure.  I mean, really?  They should have just called Child Protective Services right there!  FAILURE!

 

Run back into ped's office...we get called back by my sweet nurse (who is APPALLED al my wait) at 4:20 who is FUMING mad at front desk biatches.  We get back and another nurse asks a string of annoying questions...3 year old is screaming like a banshee and climbing on a rolling stool trying to kill himself.  My phone rings...it is the dentist's office asking permission to do x-rays of 6 year old's mouth b/c the hygenist SEES something strange.  Sure....x-ray her up!  Failure. 

 

Ped comes in - laughs at my story - and checks 3 year old's ears.  Fluid filled but not infected.  Wants to see him in 8 weeks to make sure fluid is gone; I laugh and explain he will be back before then with an ear infection, she agrees...says "see you then and we'll refer to ENT after that happens" and I literally RUN out of the door.  FAILURE.

 

Back downstairs, they tell me they can clean 3 yr old's teeth but not me....fine.  I reschedule for Wednesday while 3 yr old is at his little "school".  3 year old end up being a freaking CHAMP at the dentist and acts great.  Teeth look great.  6 yr old's xrays?  FAILURE.  She has TWO cavaties....between molars on each side of her mouth.  I take FULL credit for this.  Yes, she eats too much junk...AND I started letting her brush her own teeth WAY before I let my 8 year old.  And, let's be brutally honest, my 6 year old is LAZY.  Those freaking teeth probably haven't felt a brush in MONTHS.  UGH!  FAILURE.

 

Hubby was at a dinner meeting, so we do 6 year old's homework in the car and then picked up pizza, pick up 8 year old from dance, come home.  I feed everyone; girls bathe in shifts so that I can help the other with homework.  Perfect example of 6 year old's laziness....her shower is approx 30 seconds.  When pressed she finally cops to ONLY using shampoo in her hair -- no conditioner and NO soap or body wash on her body.  AT ALL.  FAILURE!

 

While finishing up homework, 3 year old gets his hands on a water bottle and I say, "Bring that to Mommy, you are going to spill it." To which he responds, by removing the top and dumping all the water on the floor.  Followed by a spanking...and time out in a chair.  FAILURE.

 

While 8 year old showers, I bathe 3 year old...on and on.  Girls practice piano.  I get people in bed 40 min LATE. FAILURE.

 

I get up at 5 a.m. Wednesday morning and exercise....walk up the basement stairs and can hear 3 year old in his room on 2nd floor yelling "Mommy, I need to potty!"  Up I go to get him, yep.... I put him to bed and forgot to put a diaper on him...he wet the bed in the night, though he DID use the potty when he got out of bed.  So, commence to making him shower with me at inconvenient time of a.m. so that he won't smell like urine all day.  FAILURE.

 

Realize that today is the day that local 21 yr old (son of 6 yr old and 8 yr old's piano teacher and 3 yr old's kindermusic teacher) is having his body returned to Oboro.  He was killed in action in Afghanistan....literally the day AFTER this woman's mother passed away.  No joke.  I of course have an effing DENTIST appt (obviously rescheduled from FAILURE on Tuesday) that directly interferes with attending the ceremony at the airport, so I race to a spot right after dentist that I know the motorcade from the airport with make to the funeral home and am KICKING myself that I did not plain ahead ahead and get my kids check out of school so they could stand with me.  Believe me, the motorcade of a fallen soldier is not easily forgotten....I really wish my girls could have experienced that reverence and love.  Failure.  I end up stand on the corner looking like a really BAD streetwalker, hair never got fixed, wearing new exercise clothes, but sloppy nonetheless.  Several business owners and locals are lining the street in different areas around me...I stand there on that corner and bawl like a baby through the entire motorcade.  I can not imagine how that woman is putting one foot in front of the other.  The family's limo actually stopped for a moment in front of us....and I could see her with her big glasses sitting in between her hubby and someone else.  I mean, I was in a state uncontrollable SOBBING.  Failure....just b/c my heart can't even take the THOUGHT of this and she is living it :-(  Look over, and there is a NEWSTEAM with their cameras pointed in my direction.  REALLY???  This motorcade passed SCHOOLS of children standing outside with flags and you are gonna film what looks like a homeless woman (who has taken off her visor and has visor hair) ???  FAILURE!

 

And here there I sat on Wednesday night.  Gross and disgusting!  FAILURE...and I even effing SHOWERED this morning.  WTH?

 

**All the above written was a total play-by-play that I sent via email to a friend about my day.  She told me to replace the word "failure" with "normal" in every sentence.  It's why she is my friend........**

 

Happy day, all!
xoxo Jennifer